The-saga-of-the-thought-stolen-purse/
Happy Monday! Because I’m traveling today, I thought I’d leave you with something that ideally will brighten your day. Note: My thought-stolen-purse saga happened some years ago, and yes, I’m still married to the guy. For the record, I didn’t even change the names to protect the innocent.
By Donnell Ann Bell
My day starts out great. I have Toastmasters at seven-thirty; and at ten till seven, amazed I’m well ahead of schedule, I gather my books, prepared to grab my purse off the counter, which is tucked inconspicuously inside my gray Adidas gym bag. After Toastmasters, I’m off to the gym.
Only problem is when I scan the counter on this start-to- a-perfect day, my bag is missing. I can swear I left it right there. Obviously mistaken, I search my usual places—my office, bedroom, the car. My gray Adidas gym bag is nowhere to be found.
The minutes tick by and I start to sweat. Now I’ll be late for Toastmasters. I call my husband at work. “Have you seen the gray gym bag I left on the counter?”
“No, honey, very busy,” he says.
I hang up on the verge of hyperventilation. The gym bag in itself doesn’t worry me; it’s my drivers’ license and the valuables inside. Where can it be? I know I left it right here. But now I’m not so sure. Could I have left it at the gym? I must have. I pick up the phone.
“No, ma’am,” an employee says at my query. “It’s not in the lost and found and we don’t see it in the locker room, either.”
My great day continues to dwindle.
With no other choice, I search my house a second time, and when I’m positive it isn’t anywhere inside, I phone my husband again. “Les, are you sure, you haven’t seen a gray Adidas gym bag? I know you’re busy, but it’s really important. My purse was inside that bag.”
“No,” he replies adamantly. “I haven’t seen it.”
I scour the house a third time; I miss Toastmasters, becoming more confused and agitated by the second. I think back. I came straight home from the gym yesterday. I made no stops. And now my poor little ol’ mother in law is in on the action, determined to help. She looks everywhere, including the freezer and the bathtub.
Yep, I’ve been known to put my gym bag in those places!
During our rummaging, I walk into the den and discover a navy gym bag on the couch. Frowning, I unzip it, discovering my DH’s [dear husband’s] running shoes and his workout clothes inside. Frankly, I’m ashamed of myself. I’m jealous that while my gray Adidas bag has gone missing, he still has all of his gear.
All right. My bag is not in the house, it’s not at the gym, and I went nowhere yesterday. It’s been stolen. Time to call the security company that patrols my neighborhood. The officer reports no calls of intruders, but says a few cars in our area have been broken into.
I call my neighbors, my critique partner and we connect the dots. While Les and I were out taking a walk last night, someone entered our house. Thinking it was empty, the intruder became startled when he heard my mother in law. In his haste, he took the closest thing within reach–my gray Adidas gym bag.
I spend the rest of the morning canceling my checks and my credit cards, totally creeped out at the thought of someone invading my home.
When everything is cancelled, I breathe a sigh of relief and tell myself it could have been worse. At least no one accessed my credit.
Determined to move on from this disastrous morning, I pause to answer the phone. It’s my husband. He’s on his way to his run. He’s calling to inform me he’s taken the wrong gym bag. You see, his is on the couch, while mine is in the backseat of his car!
Before you take undue sympathy and ask if my husband is colorblind, the answer is no. But he is the victim in my next murder plot.
About the Author: Donnell Ann Bell writes both romantic suspense and multi-jurisdictional task force plots, keeping close tabs on her theme SUSPENSE TOO CLOSE TO HOME. Black Pearl, a Cold Case Suspense was her first mainstream suspense and was a 2020 Colorado Book Award finalist. Her second book in the series, Until Dead, A Cold Case Suspense was awarded Best Thriller Novel at 2023 Imaginarium Convention in Louisville, KY. Follow her on social media, sign up for her newsletter or follow her blog at https://www.donnellannbell.com
Opps!! Thanks for the chuckle. It’s something that could happen in my house! I think the worse part of your situation was then you had to change the credit card number on any auto pay subscriptions etc. We finally made a list and taped it inside the kitchen cupboard!
Brilliant, Barb. What a great idea!
Hilarious, Donnell, in hindsight, I’m sure.
Absolutely, Gay. What a stressful day, and he’s still living 🙂
Donnell, I certainly hope he apologized profusely!
Really, Lois? You know better than that 🙂
But hope springs eternal, Donnell! 😉
I couldn’t stop chuckling. Sounds like something that would happen at our house……
Typically, if there’s a man involved 🙂 What a day that was!
Oh Donnell, what a stressful day! You described it so well.
Thank you, Marianne. It was therapeutic to blog about my smart but absent-minded husband.
Very funny! Thanks for sharing the story as it helps to understand when things like this happen in my household!
Kathryn Lane
Kathryn, yes, me too!!!! 🙂