Lots going on in the world this week so I’ve taken some time to wonder “do I care”? Let’s find out, shall we?
David Letterman had “relations” with several staffers, none of whom were married. He was. Do I care? No. It’s his private life—as well as Mrs. Letterman’s and his young son’s—but really, does it matter to any of us? Do I care about the mea culpas and whether they were genuine, funny, sarcastic, or smarmy?
Not a whit.
Here’s the thing—if we find out that Letterman sexually harassed any of these women, women who worked for him, then we have a different kettle of fish to fry. (And yes, I’m the queen of mixed metaphors.) My “do I care” will turn to “I most certainly do care” in a heartbeat. Because using your power to manipulate those in a subordinate position to you is certainly a crime. Having an affair while involved with someone else—while reprehensible in my book—is not. The extortion plot? Also a crime. But Letterman’s dalliances are not my business and I would rather not hear about them anymore. Go back to stupid pet tricks, Dave. Or in your case, stupid human tricks.
Crime is crime, but bad moral character is just that. And I just don’t care if my 11:30 pm talk show host guy is a philandering s.o.b.
Roman Polanski was extradicted from France after thirty years on the lam for raping a thirteen-year-old girl after plying her with champagne and Qualuudes. Do I care? You betcha. As a woman, a mother, and a person living in a society where children should matter more than they do, this event tips the scales a little more toward goodness. She was not a consenting participant in this event no matter what Mr. Polanski—or his apologists, too many to even believe—have to say on the matter.
There’s a reason that the person holding the scales of justice is a woman. I hope Mr. Polanski is as frightened as his victim presumably once was. About this I care deeply.
Jon Gosselin has suspended taping of “Jon and Kate Plus Eight.” Do I care? No, siree. Well, let’s amend that; maybe I do care if only because now those poor, innocent children will finally be able to live their collective lives off camera. Maybe something positive did come out of this after all.
I’m thinking that this post makes me sound angrier than I intend but when I realized that I had to wade through several articles on the Letterman issue in the newspaper this morning—as well as the details as to whether Polanski will ever make it here to stand trial—to find out what really was going on in the world, I got my panties in a twist so to speak. And when I saw yet another celebrity come out in support of Roman Polanski, I got a little more irate. And when I saw the Gosselins on television yet again, I was near stroke. I want to know what’s going on in the world at large, the global community, and my world. And no, I don’t mean what Michelle Obama wore overseas to try to secure the Olympics for Chicago (which I kind of care about because that woman—same age as I—really rocks the shift dress). I mean what our government is doing (or not doing, as the case may be), how our troops are faring overseas, how close we are to figuring out how to give health care coverage to the majority of citizens in this country. Or how we’re going to help the one in four American families who have had a member experience job loss in the past year. And on the lighter side, who the Mets fired and why, whether Eli will be able to throw on Sunday, and how Mark Sanchez is faring after getting spanked by the Saints. The important stuff. The stuff that matters to me.
So do I care about David Letterman? Not so much.
Roman Polanski? To the extent that if he is found guilty, his butt is fried by both a court of law and the court of public opinion.
The Gosselins? Not at all. Except for eight little children who deserve a childhood.
Your thoughts? What matters to you? And what images or stories are you assaulted with every day that send you over the edge?
Maggie Barbieri
Do I Care?
/in Uncategorized/by Stiletto GangLots going on in the world this week so I’ve taken some time to wonder “do I care”? Let’s find out, shall we?
David Letterman had “relations” with several staffers, none of whom were married. He was. Do I care? No. It’s his private life—as well as Mrs. Letterman’s and his young son’s—but really, does it matter to any of us? Do I care about the mea culpas and whether they were genuine, funny, sarcastic, or smarmy?
Not a whit.
Here’s the thing—if we find out that Letterman sexually harassed any of these women, women who worked for him, then we have a different kettle of fish to fry. (And yes, I’m the queen of mixed metaphors.) My “do I care” will turn to “I most certainly do care” in a heartbeat. Because using your power to manipulate those in a subordinate position to you is certainly a crime. Having an affair while involved with someone else—while reprehensible in my book—is not. The extortion plot? Also a crime. But Letterman’s dalliances are not my business and I would rather not hear about them anymore. Go back to stupid pet tricks, Dave. Or in your case, stupid human tricks.
Crime is crime, but bad moral character is just that. And I just don’t care if my 11:30 pm talk show host guy is a philandering s.o.b.
Roman Polanski was extradicted from France after thirty years on the lam for raping a thirteen-year-old girl after plying her with champagne and Qualuudes. Do I care? You betcha. As a woman, a mother, and a person living in a society where children should matter more than they do, this event tips the scales a little more toward goodness. She was not a consenting participant in this event no matter what Mr. Polanski—or his apologists, too many to even believe—have to say on the matter.
There’s a reason that the person holding the scales of justice is a woman. I hope Mr. Polanski is as frightened as his victim presumably once was. About this I care deeply.
Jon Gosselin has suspended taping of “Jon and Kate Plus Eight.” Do I care? No, siree. Well, let’s amend that; maybe I do care if only because now those poor, innocent children will finally be able to live their collective lives off camera. Maybe something positive did come out of this after all.
I’m thinking that this post makes me sound angrier than I intend but when I realized that I had to wade through several articles on the Letterman issue in the newspaper this morning—as well as the details as to whether Polanski will ever make it here to stand trial—to find out what really was going on in the world, I got my panties in a twist so to speak. And when I saw yet another celebrity come out in support of Roman Polanski, I got a little more irate. And when I saw the Gosselins on television yet again, I was near stroke. I want to know what’s going on in the world at large, the global community, and my world. And no, I don’t mean what Michelle Obama wore overseas to try to secure the Olympics for Chicago (which I kind of care about because that woman—same age as I—really rocks the shift dress). I mean what our government is doing (or not doing, as the case may be), how our troops are faring overseas, how close we are to figuring out how to give health care coverage to the majority of citizens in this country. Or how we’re going to help the one in four American families who have had a member experience job loss in the past year. And on the lighter side, who the Mets fired and why, whether Eli will be able to throw on Sunday, and how Mark Sanchez is faring after getting spanked by the Saints. The important stuff. The stuff that matters to me.
So do I care about David Letterman? Not so much.
Roman Polanski? To the extent that if he is found guilty, his butt is fried by both a court of law and the court of public opinion.
The Gosselins? Not at all. Except for eight little children who deserve a childhood.
Your thoughts? What matters to you? And what images or stories are you assaulted with every day that send you over the edge?
Maggie Barbieri
Back from a Weekend in San Luis Obispo
/in Uncategorized/by The Stiletto GangI love the coast. I’m speaking of California’s Central Coast. We lived in a beach community for over twenty years before moving to our present home in the foothills of the Sierra (above the Central Valley of California). Where we live now, we have real seasons–not as extreme as what some of my fellow bloggers experience, but the trees do turn color (in Southern California it’s green all year around), it gets cold, rains, and once in awhile it snows and we can see snow all around us on the mountains during the winter. And spring is wonderful, though sometimes we only get two or three days before it’s summer–summer is hot and lasts forever.
San Luis Obispo is one of those places near the beach and it stays green all year long. They think it’s hot when it turns 80. Most of the time the weather is wonderful there. It was not on Sunday.
We traveled to San Luis Obispo to attend the Central Coast Author and Book Festival.
We stayed at the Apple Farm Inn, a place we’d always wanted to experience. Our room was small, but so darling, with a canopy bed, couch and chair, a desk, an armoire, a fake fireplace and a two fresh carnations in a vase hanging on the mirror in the bathroom. The Apple Farm has beautiful flowers everywhere. The restaurant has wonderful food and most of the wait staff are students at the nearby college.
Our first evening we met friends at an interesting restaurant that is by a creek and most of the tables are outdoors. It was chilly that night and I was afraid I would be too cold–but they had heaters all around and it was quite comfortable. Victoria Heckman Doust and her hubby were there–she’s a fellow mystery author and I hadn’t seen her since we roomed together in Anchorage AK at Bouchercon. Karen Kavanaugh is also a mystery author and a publisher and she’s been a good friend for a long while. Needless to say, besides having a wonderful meal, the conversation was great.
The next morning, we arrived at the Central Coast Book and Author Festival about 8:30and found out our assigned spot. We were situated between the Central Coast Sisters in Crime booth and Madeline Gornell’s booth, another mystery writer and friend.
People started wandering by almost immediately. It looked like it would be a great day. Unfortunately, a chilly wind began to blow. It blew so hard it turned some of the umbrellas we all had over our table upside down. Authors’ decorations blew away. Picture frames fell over and glass broke. The wind seem to chase some of the interested people away too.
Oh, we all sold some books, but not as many if the weather had been a bit more cooperative. Despite all that, I felt the weekend was a success. A reader who bought a book from me at a book fest a couple of weeks ago, found me to get the next one in the series. I met a lot of people, handed out cards, talked about my books and visited with friends.
I have one more outdoor festival coming up in two weeks, the Springville Apple Festival. It’s a two day affair and almost in my back yard. We’ll be sleeping at home. I do hope the weather is a bit more cooperative.
For the writers who read this, what book selling venture did you attend that didn’t quite go the way you hoped for?
Marilyn
http://fictionforyou.com
Trust Yourself
/in Uncategorized/by The Stiletto GangI hope this book empowers new parents because while there are experts on just about every baby topic you can imagine, the one thing moms and dads should know is that THEY are the experts of their child. Read the advice, ask questions, carefully evaluate what you’ve been told, learn the tricks of the trade from those who have been in the trenches, but trust your own instincts too. You know what works best for you and your baby.
If I could give one piece of advice to new moms, it would be trite, but true. Don’t sweat the small stuff. I’d give anything to get back the hours I fretted over whether child number one would ever sleep through the night (now a bomb could go off next to his head and he wouldn’t roll over); whether he would ever be toilet-trained (I assure you he was); whether he would ever write legibly (which is why they invented word processing); whether he would be friends with the most popular kids in the class (the answer was NEVER because they were little snots and he knew it, but I didn’t. He made his own friends which have remained tried and true through the years). I worried he didn’t go to his junior prom, in fact, had one heck of a row with him about it and he just brushed me off, stubborn (or one might say, confident) in his decision. And he was more than happy to go to his senior prom, when he was good and ready.
I would have learned to trust HIS judgment and my own. I would have believed – as of course I did when I had subsequent children – that each kid marches to his own drummer and you’ve got to listen to that beat, and not allow it to be drowned out by the others in the crowd.
What I did know then – and now – is that you can never love a child too much. I wasn’t worried about spoiling any of them by giving kisses and hugs, for reasons and no reason at all. I did have standards – even if the older kids all insisted that I had let the baby of the family run wild (their definition? I bought chocolate milk one day!).
So I read these galleys with a wistful smile and a fervent hope that new parents enjoy these precious days of childhood because they go by way too fast, even if you are so sleep-deprived that you can’t imagine surviving that first year, let alone thriving.
Enjoy!
Evelyn David
http//www.evelyndavid.com
Murder Takes the Cake by Evelyn David
Murder Off the Books by Evelyn David
Garanimals for Grown-Ups
/in Uncategorized/by The Stiletto Gangby Susan McBride
I love October, and not just because it’s my birthday month. The older I get, the happier I am when summer has ended. Since I shun the sun (how else can I keep my ghostly pale
complexion?), I’m a lot less fond of shorts and bathing suits than I used to be. I long for crisp days when jeans and sweaters are the norm. And I’m thrilled that scarves are in, even with T-shirts. I’ve never worn scarves much before, except thick woolly ones to keep the cold at bay; but my fashion sense keeps changing as I, um, mature. When I go shopping now, I realize I’m drawn to items that I would’ve bypassed maybe even a year ago. I’m less prone to buy trendy things and more enamored of classics (although I’ll never dress in Polo head-to-toe again as I did during my early college days!).
I guess I’ve got clothes on the brain as I desperately need to clean out my closets (more like purge) and sort out what fits, what I don’t wear, and what I’m lacking. The last four years have kind of ravaged my wardrobe as I’ve gone through so many changes. Back in 2005, I had shrunk down to a size zero after eating healthier (read: going vegetarian) and trying (successfully) to get my cholesterol down. I had new author photos shot, and the photographer had sent me out with a stylist because “you’re much cooler on the inside than you are on the outside,” as she put it. I was advised that my hairstyle was too “anchor-woman-ish” and my sweater-sets had to go. The stylist definitely kick-started my interest in fashion again. I realized, too, that when you’re the size of a clothes hanger, everything looks terrific. I had wonderful outfits that I wore with high heels to speaking engagements, conferences, social outings, wherever. I felt like Carrie Bradshaw in “Sex & the City” (minus the cigarettes and the promiscuous sex).
Then came my breast cancer diagnosis in late 2006. The first thing I craved out of surgery was a hamburger (which I inhaled–God, it tasted good!–but haven’t had since). I was told on no uncertain terms to eat more protein during
radiation therapy so I consumed plenty of yogurt, nuts, fish, and chicken. My doctors were thrilled when I put on 10 pounds, and my friends and family breathed a sigh of relief, too. I hadn’t realized until then that everyone thought my skinny (albeit very healthy and energetic) self had resembled nothing more than a “bobble-head doll” or a “human lollipop.” Nice. As for my fashion sense during this rough period: I lived in camisoles and sweats. Comfort was key. I worried more about healing and feeling strong again and less about dressing like a magazine cover girl. So my chic little clothes and high heels gathered dust. Once I recovered from treatment and started working out again, I lost a few pounds as I got back in shape; but my size zero days were gone for good. Which meant I had a closet filled with clothes that didn’t fit.
Once I donated some things to charity and gave others to petite friends and relatives, I was left with a wardrobe mostly comprised of various colored zip-up jackets with matching camisoles, jeans, and sweatpants. Perfect attire for writing, but not exactly how I want to dress when I’m doing a bunch of speaking gigs this month…or promoting THE COUGAR CLUB next February.
I wish there were Garanimals for grown-ups with colored tags that told me what went with what. It would make life so much easier. I find it amazing how my tastes have changed over time. I want to look good, but I need to be comfortable. I’d like fewer pieces that work together better. I want to wear heels on some occasions and flats on others, depending on what I’m doing. It’s kind of like my changing wardrobe reflects the changes I’ve made in my life. I’m learning to focus on fewer things that are more important, to toss the bad stuff as fast as I can, and to celebrate all the good stuff. It’s taken me awhile to figure out that it’s the good stuff that never goes out of style.
P.S. I’ve done a MAJOR closet overhaul, donating three fat bags of clothes and shoes to charity. Whew. That calls for a little shopping to celebrate, don’t you think?
On the Clothesline
/in Uncategorized/by The Stiletto GangWriting clothes has developed into a theme on the Stiletto Gang this week. I’ve been thinking of what I have to say on the matter. Unfortunately, it’s not much. I write at night. So when I write, I wear whatever I wore to work that day minus shoes, jacket and jewelry. I pull my hair back in a ponytail, grab a Pepsi One, maybe some Strawberry Twizzlers, and I’m good to go.
In Murder Takes the Cake, JJ’s style draws her boss’s ire:
Do you pay attention to what characters are wearing in the novels you read? Is there a character you’ll always remember because of his/her clothing?
Evelyn David
http://www.evelyndavid.com
Clothes Do Not Make the Writer (Thankfully)
/in Uncategorized/by Stiletto GangI was planning on writing about something else entirely, but Marilyn’s post yesterday generated so many comments that I took some time to think about what exactly I wear when I write and why.
I fall into both camps that were discussed yesterday—I do get up and get dressed almost immediately upon waking, but there are those days when I loll in my pajamas for a few minutes. These are the days, inevitably, when it is raining cats and dogs and someone needs a ride to school. On those days, yes, I have been known to drive around town in Old Navy pajama pants and a “Life Is Good” tee shirt, hoping against hope that I don’t break a law that would require that I pull over and face a cop, most of whom live right in the town. I’d never live it down. And, for sure, I’d end up in the “Blotter” section of our local paper, the section most often cited as the first one everyone goes to on Thursday when the Gazette arrives. Trust me—you do not want to see your name in the Blotter.
I could be one of those writers who spends an entire day in pajamas, but I don’t feel like the day has any merit until I’ve showered and dressed. Additional grooming is another matter entirely. I have just returned from a lunchtime trip to Trader Joe’s where I realized—upon gazing into the mirrored glass above some of the pre-prepared dinners—that I never brushed my hair today. There’s really no point in getting up and worrying about what you’ll wear if you forget to brush your hair, is there? Thankfully, I never forget to brush my teeth but remembering to put on a little make-up? Another one of my issues.
Work attire usually consists of tee shirts and jeans. However, there are some days that require that I leave the house to see a client and on those days, I usually put on a pair of nicer pants and a blouse with a cardigan. My mother calls these “wake clothes” because they are too dressy to hang around the house in, yet not dressy enough to wear to a wedding. To her, they represent the clothes that we normal folk call “business casual” but since we’re a wake-professional family (all Irish-Catholic families are to some degree), she has denoted them “wake clothes.” Feel free to adopt this phrase into your vernacular. Guaranteed, most everyone will know of which you speak. Incidentally, husband I went to Bermuda this summer to a resort that had five restaurants on the premises, many requiring “smart casual” wear. We wore our wake clothes. We weren’t turned away.
The only problem with the tee shirt/jean combo is that it doesn’t allow me to wear many of the fifty-odd pairs of shoes that I own, many stilettos, most dressier than the usual daily ensemble requires. So every once in a while, just to shake things up, I will put on a pair of shoes that I shouldn’t be caught dead in during the day in the middle of the week and prance on down to the A&P to clickety-clack along the aisles, feeling like Amazonian shopping woman.
But here’s an equally thought-provoking question that I’d love your input on. What’s on your desk when you write? What are your magic writing talismans?
Maggie Barbieri
What is Proper Writing Attire?
/in Uncategorized/by The Stiletto GangOf course there isn’t any such thing. I thought I’d throw the question out and learn what others wear while they are writing.
I have a good friend who gets up at 4 a.m. everyday and begins writing in her pajamas and doesn’t get dressed until she’s through with her literary process.
I must confess I always get dressed before I start my day doing anything. Could be partly because this was what my mom did until she reached her 90s, then she’d eat breakfast in her bathrobe and get dressed afterwards. Another reason is for twenty-three years hubby and I ran a licensed residential care facility in our home for six adult developmentally disabled women. We never knew when licensing or the regional center might make a surprise visit and I didn’t want to be caught looking less than professional.
I no longer worry about looking professional, but I always dress for whatever I’m going to be doing the rest of the day. Once I take my shower, I put on whatever I’m going to be wearing no matter what time that happens. I do not like to change clothes. Strange, but true. Hubby is just the opposite, he’s wear his grungies until just before it’s time to go somewhere.
Another reason I get dressed right away is because of family members who just drop in. No one bothers to knock around here and once we’re up the front door is unlocked.
So… I could be writing in casual clothes because I’m staying home all day or you might find me in business type clothes because I have to go to a meeting–like today.
Tell me about your writing attire.
Marilyn
http://fictionforyou.com
Childhood Favorites
/in Uncategorized/by The Stiletto GangOne class focused on early TV shows like Howdy Doody (hello Clarabelle!) and Captain Kangaroo (cheers Mr. Greenjeans). The production values were scarcely high-tech. There was no attempt to hide Howdy’s puppet strings and the kids in the peanut gallery were sitting on wooden benches five feet from the action. And yet they captured the imagination of kids across the country.
My own kids loved Mister Rogers Neighborhood. Calmer and far less frenetic than Sesame Street, my children, especially son number one, adored King Friday XIII and the Neighborhood of Make Believe. Little hand puppets captured his imagination, and this was the kid who adored Star Wars, so it wasn’t like he didn’t appreciate special effects.
Fred Rogers was a different kind of children’s TV host. For the first time, the star was supposed to be a grown-up, not an oversized child who got into mischief (see Pinky Lee). Rogers talked directly to children, offering reassurance and advice that this Mom continues to find valuable. There was a gentleness to his show I miss – both in current kid-vid, adult TV fare, and for that matter, in real life.
Of course, not all my TV viewing (or my children’s time in front of the boob tube) was of the educational variety. Growing up, I watched plenty of dumb sitcoms that thanks to TVLand, I can now rewatch. It’s like entering a time machine. On The Andy Griffith Show, there are silly (even offensive) stereotypes about men and women; alcoholics like Otis Campbell are portrayed as nice guys who just need a safe place to sleep it off; and in one recent show, I actually heard Andy Taylor tell Barney Fife to “come out on the porch, I need a smoke: – and then we watched him light up!
I read a lot, but also spent hours in front of the television watching soap operas, game shows, and variety hours. I’m convinced that time dedicated to All My Children and General Hospital taught me about plot development and pacing (most of all, I learned that at some point, a storyline can get dragged out waaaay too long and the audience, or reader, loses interest).
What were your favorite childhood TV shows – the good, the bad, and the ridiculous?
Evelyn David
Murder Takes the Cake by Evelyn David
Murder Off the Books by Evelyn David
http://www.evelyndavid.com
Subliminal Plagiarism
/in Uncategorized/by Stiletto GangI recently asked readers at my blog for some help with fresh topics and my friend Cathy McDonald asked this:
I know you read a lot…how do you keep the plots and twists and characters that you have previously read about from becoming a part of your book? I mean the leftover spaghetti from Sunday, the corn and green beans we had Monday, and the roasted chicken leftover from tonight will become chicken vegetable soup tomorrow…each part recognizable from some other dinner. How do you make it a “new meal” in your head rather than leftovers you remember?
Good stuff. I like this vegetable soup analogy except the part about the spaghetti noodles. But if I were having dinner at Cathy’s house, I’d eat the chicken, vegetable, and spaghetti noodle soup and love it. Mmm!
This isn’t the first time I’ve thought about her question. I’ve heard authors address the same thing at writers’ conferences. At least two panelists have said that they refrain from reading mysteries while they are working on a book because they fear committing what one speaker dubbed “subliminal plagiarism.” I subliminally plagiarized that guy and used his phrase as my title today.
So I guess now this has happened to me.
But seriously, I count myself among the lucky ones because this hasn’t been a problem for me yet. Maybe that’s because I’m only working on my second book. I’ll be interested to hear what the other, more prolific, Stiletto Gang ladies have to say about their reading and writing experiences in this regard. Since it takes me about a bazillion years to finish a manuscript, refraining from reading mysteries anytime I’m working on a project would basically mean taking a vow of whodunit chastity.
Even though it takes more than a year for me to write a book, the whole time I’m working on the story I already know what I’d like to happen. The struggles, conflicts, clues, and ending have already been imagined if only in a crude form. The real work lies in getting the words on paper and bridging the gaps in the story. In other words, I’m not at a loss for ideas once I’ve started a story. The idea train has already left the station.
When I read other people’s books, I’m relaxing and being entertained. In fact, I’m usually reading those books because I’m putting off working on my own. The last thing I want to do is make any connections between the polished, engrossing novel in my hands and the horrid, incoherent rough draft waiting on my laptop. A link between the two would only remind me of what I ought to be doing instead.
But perhaps the most compelling reason that ideas never mix for me is that when I’m reading, I’m not in my world anymore, I’m in the story world. I’m not thinking about my manuscript challenges because I’m too caught up in the action on the page. When I’m away from a story I’m reading, I’m more inclined to worry about its characters or try to find time to sneak in more reading than I am to draw parallels to my own work. I think because, to some degree, I view the story I’m writing as work and the ones I’m reading as fun.
Here’s the best way to explain. I wouldn’t enjoy a pool party with my co-workers. Part of that scenario is fun but the other part is work. Mixing them together is just a bunch of unsightly researchers in Speedos.
Rachel Brady
My Fall TV Line-Up
/in Uncategorized/by The Stiletto GangI confess – I’m a tv addict. Always have been. Each year since forever I’ve had my list of shows. I never miss them if I can help it.
For decades the Special Fall Season TV Guide was my playbook. (Remember when the TV Guides were small and user-friendly? No grids.) I compared the new shows to each other and figured out their timeslots. In the pre-vcr days, I had to choose between competing shows. I was partial to dramas. Still am.
I tried to give each new show a look. It used to be that all shows were on at least a half year before being cancelled or moved to a new day and time – so with a little organization I could sample a couple of episodes of each before settling in with my favorites.
Not so any more. Some shows are cancelled after two or three episodes. If you want to see the new shows, you have to hurry!
I still subscribe to the TV Guide, but I don’t get my tv program planning from it. I get lost with all the channel listings.
I’m left with commercials. Yep, commercials are good for something! When I see a commercial for a new tv show that looks interesting, I take note of the name, then look it up on-line. Every self-respecting tv show has a webpage or maybe even a whole website dedicated to it.
My returning favorites are:
New shows I want to see:
What new shows are you planning to watch?
Evelyn David
http://www.evelyndavid.com/