Tag Archive for: Malice Domestic

Memories of Malice Domestic 27

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Memories of Malice Domestic 27 by Debra H. Goldstein

Not enough sleep as toastmaster Toni L.P. Kelner urged all of us to get during the weekend, but there definitely was plenty of fun, friends, and sharing of stories, beverages, and new experiences at the 2015 Malice Domestic Convention that now is in the history books.  Held in Bethesda, Maryland, Malice is billed as a fan conference.

Since I began attending in 2012 when I was on the Academic Panel talking about my mystery on the University of Michigan’s campus, Maze in Blue, I haven’t been certain who the fans really are because I think the writers and the non-writers equally qualify as fans.  I know I am thrilled when the two non-writers who met me at the 2012 New Authors Breakfast make it a point to find me and tell me that they have followed my career this year (For their loyalty, they both will receive free copies of my new book, Should Have Played Poker: a Carrie Martin and the Mah Jongg Players Mystery, when it is published by Five Star in February 2016). But, the truth is that I am personally excited to meet writers I have held in esteem for years and newbies that I can’t wait to follow. See if you recognize a few of both in these pictures that capture some of my Malice Domestic 27 memories:

2015 Academic Mystery Panel – Susan Van Kirk, Lori Rader-Day, DHG, Triss Stein, Neil Plakcy

Jungle Red Writers Game with Hallie Ephron, Rhys Bowen, Charlaine Harris, Roberta Isleib/Lucy Burdette, Hank Phillippi Ryan and the game players including DHG

Picture One:  Nikki Bonnani, Susan Van Kirk, Marilyn Levinson, Grace Topping
Picture Two: DHG, Catriona McPherson, Barb Goffman
Picture Three:  Maggie Toussaint, Nancy J. Cohen, Maggie King, DHG
Picture Four:  Terrie Fairley Moran & DHG
Picture Five: Kathy Waller & DHG
Picture Six:  Edith Maxwell & DHG
Picture Seven:  Leslie Budewitz & DHG
Look at my grin — who says writers aren’t fans?  Do you admit it, too?

Meet the Authors of the 2014 Agatha Best Short Story Nominees!

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Each
year at Malice Domestic, writing excellence is recognized by the Agatha awards.
This year’s nominees for Best Short Story are:
“The Blessing
Witch” (PDF)
by Kathy Lynn Emerson, Best New England Crime Stories 2015: Rogue Wave
(Level Best Books)
“Just
Desserts for Johnny” (PDF) by Edith Maxwell (Kings River Life Magazine)
“The
Shadow Knows” by Barb Goffman, Chesapeake Crimes Homicidal Holidays
(Wildside Press)
“The
Odds are Against Us” (PDF) by Art Taylor, Ellery Queen Mystery Magazine, Nov.
2014
“Premonition” by Art Taylor,
Chesapeake Crimes Homicidal Holidays (Wildside Press)
Please
enjoy the opportunity to read these stories, if you haven’t already. We are so
fortunate to have with us today Kathy Lynn Emerson, Edith Maxwell, Barb Goffman, and Art Taylor. All are not
only fabulous writers, but also delightful people. Thanks, Kathy, Edith, Barb,
and Art, for stopping by to share your work and thoughts with us!
How do you compare short story writing with
novel writing?
KATHY:
Writing short stories is much
harder. In quite a few cases, it took me longer to finish a short story than it
did to write an entire 80,000 word novel. With at least one story, it took me
years to get it right. When I write novels, they get longer with each revision.
When I revise a short story, it almost always ends up even shorter.
EDITH:
A heck of a lot shorter, for one thing!
When I had two-thirds of a novel in the drawer twenty years ago and then
reentered the paid work force while raising two sons, there was no way I could
carry the plot and characters of a book around in my head and fit them into the
tiny snatches of time I had available to writer. But I could manage a short
story, and wrote nearly a dozen, five of which were eventually published in
juried anthologies. Short stories are simpler. They’re not necessarily easier,
but they don’t take as much time or brain space to complete.
BARB:
For me, writing a novel is like the
long con. I start in one place, and I know that eventually I’ll bring the
reader to another place. But in the middle there will be detours and red
herrings and subplots. I want to keep readers from seeing where we’re going. I
want to fool them. To surprise them. I might set something up in chapter two
that will pay benefits three hundred pages later. That’s the long con.
With a short story, there’s no space
for the long con. I’m writing the equivalent of a bank robbery. I get in, get
the cash, and get out. No detours. No subplots. It’s a quick ride. Sure, short
stories and novels both should have a great beginning and ending and hopefully
a surprise or two, but the way I approach the middle is different.
ART:
Each time I’ve tried to write a full
novel, I’ve struggled with structure and pacing to the point that the results
have always been bumpy at best, dismal at worst—and none of them has seen the
light of day. With my upcoming novel-in-stories, On the Road with Del and
Louise (coming out this September from Henery Press), I’ve tried to
capitalize on what I think I do well: manage the narrative arc—the structure
and pacing—of a short story, and link those stories together in contribution to
a larger narrative arc featuring the bigger story of these characters. To some
degree, I think I just understand short stories better, for better or worse.
What advice would you give to short story
writers?
KATHY:
Keep it simple. In a short
story there is no room for subplots, information dumps, or complicated
relationships. I’d say limit the number of characters, but that would be a tad
hypocritical since I’ve never managed to follow that piece of advice myself.
EDITH:
Don’t send it in too early. Get the
first draft done and let it stew for a while. Then work to eliminate everything
unnecessary, whether a description that doesn’t move the story forward or a character
you can do without. And then work it over again, polishing, trimming. I’ve seen
a couple of beginning writers dash off a short and send it in (well, I did the
same myself when I was starting out) when it wasn’t quite ready.
BARB:
Read. Read novels. Read short stories.
Read, read, read. It gets your brain moving. It teaches you technique, even if
you don’t realize it as it’s happening. It helps you learn what works and what
doesn’t.
And when you write, keep two things in
mind: (1) Everything in the story should move the plot forward. If a scene or
character can come out without affecting the plot, it doesn’t belong in the
story. (2) But don’t make your plot move so quickly that your main character
doesn’t have the time to react to what’s happening. Reactions are interesting.
They bring the character to life and add richness to the story. So show us her
thoughts, and then move that plot along.
ART:
Write the biggest story you can and
then cut and fold, cut and fold, cut and fold until the only words left are
those that are key to the story—that’s the ideal for me, even I personally feel
like I’m always falling short of that goal. The novelist’s art strikes
me generally as one of accumulation, where the short story writer should
ideally focus on subtraction—the most effect in the fewest words—and training
yourself to see where to cut and combine and condense is a challenge. Beyond
that, read widely in the short story form. There are so so many great
short story writers out there, each of them with different stylistic and
structural approaches, and there’s so much to learn from them and then maybe
apply in your own way to your own craft.
For the Agatha banquet, what kind of shoes would you (or if
you prefer, your protagonist, a character from your story, or your spouse)
wear? [This is, after all, The Stiletto Gang!]
KATHY:
The same ones I wear every
year—black SAS sandals with one-inch heels. Definitely no stilettos. I have
trouble enough walking in the sandals. By rights I should be wearing old-lady-with-arthritis
orthopedic lace-ups!
EDITH:
I’m so shoe impaired in terms of what’s
conventional. I’m trying to come up with a pair of party shoes that aren’t
either stilettos or some version of little-girl shoes. I have short wide feet
and refuse to wear heels, so it isn’t easy! You’re going to have to wait and
see what I find. Maybe we can do a follow up post with a picture of all our
Agatha banquet shoes…
[Edith sent her picture early, so I
wanted to share it. I’ll see if I can get shots of the shoes actually worn at
the banquet!—Paula]
BARB:
Gus, my main character from my
Agatha-nominated story “The Shadow Knows,” wouldn’t go to a banquet. It’s way
too fancy for him. But if he were forced, Gus would wear plain, comfortable
shoes. I’m similar in that respect. My shoes will be black and nearly flat and
above all else, comfortable. I want to enjoy the evening, which means doing
what I can to avoid aching feet.
ART:
I’ve got a pair of suede saddle shoes that
I regularly want to wear (khaki green panel over off-white), but my wife Tara
says they don’t ever match what I put them with, so…. We’ll see if I can ever
come up with a good combination! [Here are Art’s shoes for your viewing pleasure!—Paula]

Comparing the Thoughts of Three Mardi Gras Murder Short Story Authors

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The different ways authors work is intriguing and
educational.  While reading the thirteen
stories included in Mardi Gras Murder,
a short story anthology published by Mystery and Horror LLC, I
wondered if the other authors had approached their crime themed stories as I
did when writing Who Dat? Dat the Indian
Chief! To answer my questions, I
contacted Harriette Sackler – Queen of
the King Cakes and Sarah Glenn – Red
Beans and Ricin.
1.  Tell me a plot
teaser about your Mardi Gras Murder
story:
Harriette:  Queen of the King Cakes is about a young
woman who is determined to fulfill her dream of achieving success in an area
she is most passionate about.   However,
one decision changes the course of her life.
Sarah:  In Red Beans and Ricin, private eye Lana
Fisher’s red beans take the blame when the guests at a Cajun potluck fall
ill.  When the hostess dies, Lana must
clear her name.
Debra:  Who Dat? Dat the Indian Chief! focuses
on the New Orleans Mardi Gras Indian Tribe parades and traditions.  This story of redemption is set post Katrina.
Harriette Sackler
2.  How did you get
the idea and come to write your short story?
Harriette:  I find
that somehow, my stories just come to me. 
Some of them are based on observations or incidents that have stuck in my mind over time.  This story actually revolves around a woman who lived on our block when I was a little girl and the wonderful times I spent with my grandmother who shared a passion similar to my protagonist.

Sarah:  I started with
the notion of Fat Wednesday, because I belonged to a group that celebrated it
for the same reasons J.  When I
mentioned setting a mystery during Mardi Gras to a friend, he said, “Red beans
and ricin?” which was just perfect.
Debra:  I saw an open
call for short stories for a Mardi Gras anthology.  Not knowing much about Mardi Gras events, I
started researching different parades. When I found historical info about how
the offspring of slaves and Indians created alternate parade activities, my
imagination ran wild – especially in light of the aftermath of Katrina.
3.  Did you need to do
research for the story?
Harriette:  Yes.  I did research for this story.  I read about the history of King Cakes, the
geography of New Orleans, and the Louisiana penal system.
Sarah:  Yes.  I was afraid that the FBI or some such would
investigate my online searches, but I would have to get in line.  There are a number of Breaking Bad fan sites
now that reference ricin.  I also wrote
Luci Zahray, the Poison Lady, about possible methods of introducing the
ricin.  Gwen Mayo helped me with the
method I finally chose.  Won’t divulge
that part, since it’s a spoiler.
Debra H. Goldstein
Debra:  I read
everything I could find on Mardi Gras Indian tribe parades, the routes they use,
and the special way the tribes communicate so that I could make my story
realistic.  Because I have not spent much
time in New Orleans, I contacted two friends who are natives to find out about
schools, streets, parishes, and other physical landmarks so my setting would be
accurate.

Our stories are very different.  Two of us use a prompt or research idea to
stimulate our imagination while things flow for the third writer, but no matter
how we approach our writing, we utilize research skills and personal memories.  The attention we give to details brings our
stories alive for readers.  The result,
in this case, is the Mardi Gras Murder anthology
that offers something for everyone.
~ ~ ~ ~ ~ 
Harriette Sackler serves as Grants Chair of the Malice Domestic Board of Directors. She is a past Agatha Award nominee for Best Short Story for “Mother Love,” Chesapeake Crimes II. “Fishing for Justice,” appeared in the Sisters in Crime-Guppies anthology, Fishnets.  “Devil’s Night,” can be found in All Hallows’ Evil,” a Mystery and Horror, LLC anthology.  “Thanksgiving with a Turkey,” appeared in a Shaker of Margaritas: a Bad Hair Day; and “The Factory,” was published in Chesapeake Crimes: This Job is Murder.
Harriette is a member of Mystery Writers of America, Sisters in Crime, Sisters in Crime-Chesapeake Chapter, and the Guppies. She lives in the D.C. suburbs with her husband and their three pups and spends a great deal of time as Vice President of her labor of love: House with a Heart Senior Pet Sanctuary. She is a proud mom and grandmother.  Visit Harriette at: www.harriettesackler.com .
~ ~ ~ ~ ~
Sarah Glenn  has a degree in journalism. She spent a few years as a grad student in Classical Languages. She generally writes in the mystery and horror genres. Gwen Mayo and Sarah started Mystery and Horror LLC in 2011, after each had a novel published by another publisher.  Sarah’s most recent non-MAHLLC publication was in Hoosier Hoops and Hijinks, an anthology from the Speed City chapter of Sisters in Crime. She co-wrote The Odds Are Always Uneven with Gwen Mayo, featuring characters from a novel they are writing together.
~ ~ ~ ~ ~
Debra H. Goldstein is the author of 2012 IPPY Award winning Maze in Blue, a mystery set on the University of Michigan’s campus in the 1970’s.  Harlequin Worldwide Mystery will be featuring Maze in Blue as an April 2014 book of the month. In addition to the recently published Who Dat? Dat the Indian Chief! in Mardi Gras Murder, Debra’s Early Frost short story will be included in the April 2014 Birmingham Arts Journal.
  

How Do You Decide Which Mystery or Writing Conference to Go to?

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Going to mystery cons are so much fun–and I used to go to a lot more than what I do now. The main reason I’ve cut down is I no longer enjoy flying. I’ve always had to change planes at least twice and often three times. Once I had to change concourses which meant a bus ride and going through security again.

Back when it was easier, I went to Bouchercon and Left Coast Crime no matter where they were (well in the U.S. anyway.)  After a while it was like going to a reunion because of meeting old friends–some of whom I met at previous cons.

One of my favorite cons was Mayhem in the Midlands which is no longer in existence. Too bad, Omaha was a great place to visit. And that was part of the whole experience, because all these cons are held in different cities, there is the opportunity to see places you’d never get to otherwise.

I went once to Love is Murder and loved it. Being a California native, what I didn’t love was flying in right in front of a snow storm–though loved the snow once we got settled in the hotel. Also loved meeting new people, and spending time with old friends too.

I’ve been twice to Malice Domestic–loved it, but it’s just too far away.

Left Coast Crime is another favorite–and I will be going to the one in Monterey CA–that’s drivable for me. Whether or not I’ll go to Bouchercon (also in CA–Long Beach) hasn’t been decided. Driving in L.A. traffic is another things I’ve given up.

One writing conference I go to every year is Public Safety Writers Association’s conference. The participants are made up of men and women in many public safety field, active and retired: police, FBI, dispatchers, firefighters, the Air Force equivalent of NCIS, on police psychiatrist, most of whom write mysteries or want to write mysteries and a small contingent of mystery writers who have figured out this is a good place to make friends with people who know how it really is. A small conference, it’s easy to really network.This one is always in Las Vegas in July–another I can drive to, and the month it’s held makes the hotel price cheap.

Epic is a conference for e-published authors and publishers. I’ve been to most of them. This is small and moves around each year. Whether I go to anymore will depend upon where they are

The big question is why go? First off, it’s fun. Mystery readers attend Bouchercon and Left Coast Crime. An author can meet readers with a little effort (means speaking to strangers), being friendly, and handing out business cards or bookmarks. I’ve met several readers this way who have since become my fans..

Because most of us are mystery fans too, it’s great to see your favorite authors and tell them how much you love their books.

What Mystery or Writing Conferences do you go to, and why?

Marilyn

Coming very, very soon. #13 in the Deputy Tempe Crabtree mystery series!

Ramblings From Dru

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The hardest thing about writing a monthly post is coming up with a topic that the audience will find interesting.

So here I sit, trying to think of a post to write.

Should it be related to writing? Well, since I’m not a writer, I don’t have to worry about that.

I am a reader, but how many times can I write about the number of books I’ve read since January (for the record it is 78 books).

My friends tell me that besides being a reader, I’m also a blogger/reviewer. I don’t consider myself a reviewer because my musings are short and not standardized. However on my blog I do offer a feature to authors about the day in the life of their protagonist or a recurring character from their stories.

I recently attended my fourth Malice Domestic Convention. I always have a good time and it’s a chance to attend panels; catch up with friends who I haven’t seen in a year, meet new-to-authors and reconnect with the authors I’ve already met. The one for reader fans are fun to attend and so far this year I’ll be going to four events. I’ll be at BookExpo America (BEA) where I’ll be attending the Power Reader event. Then it’s the Fan Fest at Thrillerfest this summer and last but not least I’ll be at Bouchercon in Albany. Is anyone attending any of these events?

Well, it looks like I thought of something to write.

What’s the hardest thing that you have to do?

What I’m looking forward to at Malice this year

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I didn’t know what to write about this month, so I asked readers of my Facebook page, what should I talk about and thanks to Aimee H, the above topic was born. I decided to make the post short and fun and here it is. See, I got your name in my post.

The Screams! – Seeing my friends and screaming with joy.

The Panels! – Picking and choosing which ones to attend.

The Meals! – It’s all about the food and good talks.

Co-mingling! – Hanging in the lounge, catching up on everyone’s life.

Did I say “The Screams?” – Lots of hugs going around.

The Conversations! – Catching the latest news and just having a good time.

The Bar! – Where drinks will be flowing.

My Autograph Book! – I can’t wait to add more signatures.

The Authors! – More screams of joy when seeing old and new friends.

The Goodie Bag! – The joy of opening our goodie bag and checking out the new books tucked inside.

The Swags! – I can’t wait to see what I pick up.

Old Friends! – Seeing friends I haven’t seen since the last Malice convention.

New Friends! – Meeting new friends I met on Facebook or by reading their book.

And Best of All, The Sightings! – I love that first sighting of an author or my friends.

If you’re going to Malice or any reader/author convention, what are you looking forward?

What Are Your Feelings About Big Mystery Cons?

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Recently I read a blog post from an author titled, “Why I Quit Going to Bouchercon” and some of the things expressed I’ve been feeling.

My hubby and I have been to several all over the U.S. We had a great time, especially exploring cities we’ve never been to before and wouldn’t have visited were it not for Bouchercon. Did it do anything for my career as an author? Not a whole lot. To even get my books into the book room, I always had to negotiate with the book dealer who wanted the standard 40/60 cut which meant I didn’t make a dime on any book sold. (I bought the books I brought with me at that same 40% cost.)

Being with small presses doesn’t impress the Bouchercon committees. In fact, I read the minutes of one of those committees after a Bouchercon I’d attended and several members actually came out and said “too many small press authors attended, discouraging the big name authors.” Does that mean my money isn’t as good as anyone else’s? After all, I paid a hefty fee to go, stay in the convention hotel and the transportation to get there and back.

My last Boucheron was the recent one in San Francisco. I went because it was close enough for me to get there fairly easily. I didn’t even bother to try to get my books in the book room. Hubby didn’t go and I roomed with an old friend I hadn’t seen for awhile. I had a great time schmoozing with people and wasn’t impressed with the panels I attended. Especially the one on e-books. The panelist, all published by big name publishers, didn’t know much of anything about e-books. This would have been a great panel for small press authors to shine, but they weren’t asked.

A big plus, is I have made friends with some wonderful fans of the mystery genre who have become fans of my mystery series.

Left Coast Crime is smaller and a bit more small press author friendly. I’ve already signed up for the one in Monterey CA. (Also easy for me to get to.)

There are other smaller cons around the country like Love is Murder (been once and loved it), Malice Domestic (been twice and it is also a great conference), Killer Nashville (been to one and thought it was fun) and I know there are many others in the Midwest. Public Safety Writers Association is the smallest one I got too because I get to learn a lot from experts and small press authors get to shine.

For me these days, I’m weighing in the problems of traveling when you’re older. I can no longer run through an airport with my carry-ons to get to my next gate on time which is 1/2 mile away, whether what I’ll get out of the conference or convention will be worth the cost (and I do count meeting and making friends with readers).

What are your feelings about these conventions and conferences for writers? And if you are strictly a reader, if you go, what do you like best? What are your favorite cons and why?

Marilyn

A Town Called Malice

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This past weekend, I had the pleasure of traveling down the
New Jersey Turnpike into Maryland with the lovely and talented Laura Bradford
to the annual Malice Domestic convention. 
(And for any of you ‘80s-music devotees out there, does anyone else
think of The Jam song, “A Town Called Malice”? 
I do.)  As always, it was a
wonderful time, filled with the nicest mystery writers and the most wonderful
readers, people who are so devoted to the genre as to have encyclopedic
knowledge of every book every written, it would seem.
Laura and I couldn’t be more compatible as roommates:  she likes the room cold like I do, goes to
bed early like I do, and is always willing to listen to my latest hare-brained
idea concerning a new book or plot twist. 
Oh, and she loves pretzels, just like I do!  I couldn’t have asked for a better person to
share the experience with, right down to our delightful Burger King meal at a
rest stop on the Turnpike, which she managed to make enjoyable.
Sara J. Henry, a debut novelist who won the Mary Higgins
Clark Award—an award for which I was a judge—at the Edgars prior to the
convention for her novel LEARNING TO SWIM, also won the Agatha for Best First
Novel.  If you haven’t read this book,
get it.  It’s fantastic.  It begins with a woman on a ferry who sees a
little boy being thrown overboard and it takes off from there.  A fantastic read.
I was on a panel that was geared toward sports-related
mysteries, a result of my last book—PHYSICAL EDUCATION—being set in the world
of women’s college basketball.  Alan
Orloff made a fine moderator—or shall we say “referee”—for the panel which
included Beth Groundwater, Sasscer Hill, and Laura DiSilverio.  Although I didn’t have much to say about my
less-than-illustrious CYO basketball career, I was able to relive the moment
that I hit a walk-off grand slam in our town’s softball playoffs.  Good times.
Laura crafted a panel moderated by Aimee Hix that exposed
the “dirty little secrets” that writers have including who they model their murder
victims on, what the eat when they are on deadline, and how they come up with
their ideas.  For the record, my
answers:  1) no one you know (not that I
would ever tell); 2) pretzels; 3) while driving.
If you’ve heard it once, you’ve heard it a thousand
times:  writing is a solitary, sometimes
lonely profession.  To be around five
hundred people who all love the same thing—mystery—is exhilarating and
fulfilling.  I leave Malice every year
energized to finish that first draft or start something new and to everyone who
attended and contributed to that feeling, I say “thank you.”
Maggie Barbieri

High Heels & Me

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Meredith Cole

I have a confession to make. I can’t wear stilettos. Hmm. I hope this admission won’t get kicked off the blog today. Perhaps it will help if I say that my sleuth in POSED FOR MURDER and DEAD IN THE WATER wears heels? I’ve tried to wear high heels, but I always feel like I’m walking on stilts. I’ve seen women who strut around in their heels looking sexy and strong. Unfortunately I just wobble along, and fifteen minutes into the evening ache all over.

Living in New York, an uncomfortable pair of shoes could absolutely ruin my entire day (or week, if they ripped up my feet enough). Walking absolutely everywhere on hard and unforgiving pavement, it was comfortable shoes all the way. Stilettos were, my friends and I fondly liked to say, “taking a taxi shoes.” I don’t think the women in Sex in the City ever tried to run for an N train in their sexy stilettos. They would have ended up with one of those shoes stuck in a grate and a sprained ankle – or worse.

My contentious relationship with heels began when I grew to be five foot four in the 5th grade. All the boys were six inches shorter. So my first pair of heels was just ½” high. I still felt like I was towering over everyone. I grew to be 5’8” but I frequently have people ask (or assume) that I’m taller. Good posture, I guess. It’s certainly not because I wear heels.

Occasionally when I go to speak to a group that’s read my book, I get a funny look. I usually have a good idea why. They’re expecting me to be a twenty-something, funkily dressed artist—just like my sleuth. But Lydia McKenzie and I are pretty different people. She’s young and single, and I’m married and have a child. She lives in Brooklyn, and I’ve moved back home to Virginia. She’s a photographer, and I’m a filmmaker turned novelist. And Lydia always wears crazy vintage clothes.

I’m not a dull dresser at all. I enjoy clothes, and love to shop at second hand stores. I love fabrics and color, and putting on outfits in the morning. But I like to be comfortable, too. There has to be an inner beauty that shines through when your toes can breathe, your arches are supported, and you don’t feel like you’re going to sprain your ankle when you take a step. At least that’s what I keep telling myself.

So will Lydia ever learn to tone down her clothes? She’s a fictional sleuth, so she can walk on the wild side. She’s looking for murderers with her camera, stumbling over dead bodies, and running for her life, so wearing heels seems pretty safe in comparison. Besides, she can always kick them off now and then and give her feet a rest. That’s what I would do.

______________________
Meredith Cole started her career as a screenwriter and filmmaker. She was the winner of the St. Martin’s Press/Malice Domestic competition, and her book POSED FOR MURDER, was published by St. Martin’s Minotaur in 2009. She was nominated for an Agatha Award for Best First Mystery Novel in 2010. Her second book, DEAD IN THE WATER, continues the adventures of photographer and amateur sleuth Lydia McKenzie in Brooklyn. She teaches writing at the University of Virginia. Visit her website here

She Said/She Said: Sixteen Degrees of Separation

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She Said/She Said: Sixteen Degrees of Separation by Maggie Barbieri and Rachel Brady

We’re doing this blog a little differently today because I had the pleasure of sharing a hotel room this past weekend with the lovely and talented Rachel Brady. The song asks “Who can turn the world on with her smile?” and insinuates that it’s Mary Richards, but I’m here to tell you that it’s Rachel Brady. A more positive and uplifting person you will never meet. Besides the whole getting up in the morning to exercise thing, I thought we would be completely compatible as roomies.

I was wrong.

I checked into the room around dinner time on Thursday night after a five hour drive to D.C. The air outside was thick and muggy, unseasonably warm for a night in late April. When I entered the room, I felt as if I had entered a cabana in Belize, moisture dripping from the humidity affixed to the plate glass window overlooking the street below. Surely, Rachel wouldn’t want to be melting in this incredible heat, not to mention having her already-curly and gorgeous hair grow in size from just two minutes in the room? Before even stopping in the restroom (something I do frequently, if only to wash my hands, as Rachel learned), I headed to the thermostat and promptly dropped the temperature from seventy-four degrees to fifty-eight degrees. In about fifteen minutes, the room had that lovely arctic chill that I have come to expect in all of my sleeping quarters. (And yes, my husband sleeps in sweatpants and sweatshirts most of the time so as not to succumb to hypothermia.)

I immediately got into bed with a bag of pretzels and a glass of wine and proceeded to watch television until Rachel showed up a little after nine o’clock. As I had predicted to her when we first spoke, I was almost asleep even though she was still full of energy and ready to head down to the bar.

She was kind enough not to mention that the temperature in the room was akin to that in a meat locker and hastily retreated to the lobby bar where drinks—and heat—were in abundance.

I fell asleep as soon as she left, peaceful under the down comforter, and clad in fleece pajama pants. Some time around two in the morning, I awoke in a pool of my own sweat, wondering how the temperature in the room could have shot up so dramatically in such a short period of time. Now, Rachel’s hot, but was she that hot?

The next morning, I checked the thermostat, set to seventy-four degrees. After some tense interrogation, Rachel admitted that she had nearly frozen to death in bed and got up, using her cell phone as a flashlight, and turned the temperature to seventy-four.

We were sixteen degrees apart in the comfort zone.

We negotiated. I cajoled. Rachel cried. I think I passed out at one point. How could we reach consensus? Finally, we decided that we would set the temperature at sixty-four, even though that was way too hot for me and way too cold for her.

Did I mention that Rachel’s an engineer by day? Did I mention that I can only fiddle with things, or fix them, if I have a butter knife? I’m not accusing her outright, but the temperature was set at seventy for the entire weekend and I couldn’t figure out how to lower it.

Coincidence? I will let you decide.

~ ~ ~

Hmmm. Rachel here. That is not exactly how I remember it. Except for the complimentary parts. Let’s go with those. (Thanks, Maggie! )

This is what really happened.

I rolled in sometime after nine on Thursday and found Maggie cozied up in bed, watching TV in our room. We spent a few minutes catching up and talked about all sorts of stuff, but the only piece relevant here is her passing remark that she “could sleep with the window open when it is 35 degrees outside.” She said it drove her husband nuts.

“You mean you leave it open a crack, for fresh air?”
“No,” she said. “I pretty much leave it wide open. Then he closes it during the night and I wake up sweating.”

Soon afterward, I went down to the bar to see which of my writer friends I could find. An hour or two later, I came back to the room. Maggie was sleeping.

And it was nippy.

My epiphany came on slowly. Under a thick comforter, in flannel pj pants and a cotton tee, and even wearing socks, at first I didn’t know just how cold I was. Thought I could gut it out. Have you ever been so cold in your bed that you don’t want to roll over because then you will have to warm up a new cold spot, and it’s just too dang cold to suffer through that process again?

Most of me thought that the room temp was probably due to some glitch in the thermostat’s auto timing feature. I didn’t remember seeing my breath earlier when I’d brought up my bag.

But a small, kind of worried part of me feared that maybe Maggie hadn’t been exaggerating about that 35 degree, open window remark.

What to do.

If it were an auto-timer glitch, I might shiver needlessly all night. If she’d done it on purpose and I switched it back, she would sweat all night instead.

Better her than me.

Maggie had a good sleep going. I decided to fix the temp and then just play dumb later if she brought it up. The room was pitch black, so by light of my open cell phone, I crept to the thermostat, aimed my phone at it, and was surprised and horrified to find it set at 64 degrees. Definitely, an auto timer glitch then.

I changed it to 74 and went back to bed. In the morning, I confessed all to Maggie. She said, “Oh that. I actually prefer 58 degrees but I thought I’d meet you in the middle.”

?!

I did math. “That means you think 70 is room temperature to regular people. This is sixteen degrees of separation.”

A long discussion ensued, mostly through tears of laughter. We knew we had Wednesday’s blog covered.

Maybe living in Texas has made me soft. But I offer this evidence in my defense, Maggie. Just sayin’.

I should also add here that Maggie is unequivocally the more gracious and flexible of the two of us, meeting me far to the right of Middle, usually at 70 degrees.

Interesting paradox there. One of the coldest rooms I’ve ever encountered, but one of the warmest friends.