Tag Archive for: random acts of kindness

It Was A Sign

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by Sparkle Abbey


So last
week, we were on our way to work and of course that means a trip through the
Starbucks drive-thru. Our Starbucks is very popular, especially in the
mornings and on the weekends. It’s not unusual for there to be a five or six
car wait before you even reach the speaker to place your order. Why not go
inside, you ask? Well, like most of the U.S., we’ve been hit with bone-chilling
subzero weather and over ten inches of snow. So regardless of the line, you don’t get out of your vehicle
unless you have to.



On this day,
the drive-thru was almost deserted. There were only three cars in front of us.
That’s a good thing, right? The lack of customers certainly didn’t have
anything to do with icy roads, a wind-chill of twenty below, or the fact that
it was after 8:00 am and the morning rush had already passed though. It was a
sign to proceed! So we did.

Just one example of our many Starbucks stops 
In what felt
like seconds, but was probably more like five minutes, it was our turn to order
our usual: grande non-fat no water chai, and a grande skinny hazelnut latte.
The only problem was that the driver’s window wouldn’t roll down. It was frozen
shut. There was no way that window was moving.

You see
where this is going.

Since there
were cars behind us, keeping us from backing out and a making a clean getaway,
we had only one choice—open the door to place the order. We looked rather silly, and felt
a little foolish. And while we were hoping no one was paying attention to us,
we weren’t that lucky. We caught the driver behind us was smiling at us. Our barista also got a good chuckle at our predicament and casually mentioned we weren’t the first customer with a frozen window.

Within a few
minutes it was our turn to pay. Once again, we opened the door, allowing the
freezing wind to slap us around for a few seconds and to steal our breath. As
we reached for a Starbucks card to pay, the barista informed us there was no need-—our drinks had
already been paid for. Turned out the driver in the car before us felt so bad
about our window, he paid for our drinks! A true random act of kindness. It was
completely unexpected and it totally made our day.

February 9th
– 15th  is Random Act of Kindness week. The idea is to cheer up,
inspire, or help a stranger. There are many simple acts you can do: a
smile, let someone cut in front of you in line at the grocery store, or
pay for someone’s drink at your favorite coffee shop. Most acts of kindness
are free, you don’t have to spend money to “pay it forward.”

If you’re lacking
inspiration and need some “kindness” ideas, check out the Random
Acts of Kindness website. If you’re social media savvy, take part in
helping #RAKWeek2015 trend by flooding your social media platforms with
kindness. Look for us as we’ll be taking part in the fun.
What about
you? Have you initiated a random act of kindness? Have you ever been the recipient
of an act of kindness? Tell us about it! You never know who may read your comment
and feel inspired by you!

**The
Starbucks story is mostly true. It happened to only one of us. We’ll let you
guess which one.

One last shout out! If you’re in the Ames area this week, we’ll be at the grand opening of Treats on a Leash for a book signing from 10:00 am- noon. Stop by and say hi! Click here for more details!

Twisted Sisterhood or Small Acts of Kindness, by Misa

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Recently, I was on my way to Dallas to attend a Texas Beef Council special event hosted by a fellow blogger (shout out to June Cleaver Nirvana Holly Homer!!). My daughter had been having a horrible time adjusting to 5th grade. She wasn’t sleeping, was angst-ridden over EVERYTHING, was so unhappy with her body (she’s 10!!! This worry and seeking of validation from others starts WAY too young), and was obsessing about middle school (which is still a year away).


I heard Katherine Schwartzenegger on a radio show, talking about her new book, Rock What You Got. I sat in my car and listened as she expressed how she’d felt exactly what my daughter was feeling. Needless to say, I stopped by the bookstore on the way home and picked up Rock What You Got. We’re reading it together and it’s really helping! Amazing.


Today I heard Kelly Valen talk about her new book, Twisted Sisterhood. It goes beyond the issues discussed in Rock What You Got (and I’m anticipating needing it as my girl gets older), tackling the complicated relationships women often have with one another, including passive aggressive behavior, mean girl behavior, bullying (anyone hear about Joy Behar on The View with her “comic” bullying?), and other layers of complexity and judgement within these relationships.


I see them starting now with my daughter, and while it’s great to observe and use in character development, it’s definitely not good for a girl trying to figure out who she is, what she believes, and where her validation comes from.


All this got me thinking about why it is we (meaning our culture) work so hard to tear others down instead of build them up.


I’m absolutely of the simplistic mindset that little acts of kindness go a long, long way, and shouldn’t we spend our energy on that kindness instead of on negativity?

Think about these scenarios. What would you do if:


  1. You’re on a two-way surface road driving south and there’s a lot of traffic, including a line of cars coming the other direction, in their turn lane, trying to turn left across your lanes. Do you stop before the intersection and let the cars make their turn, or do you block the intersection? (As I drove to a class I teach in Dallas tonight, I watched as car after car after car stopped in the middle of the intersection, blocking those cars who were trying to turn. When I approached the intersection–and mind you, traffic was slow up ahead so it’s not like I was blocking traffic behind me–I stopped so the cars could turn. But cars in the lanes on either side of me kept going, edging forward. It took a good minute or two before the cars in the other lanes stopped so those people could make their turn).
  2. You walk down the aisle at the market and come across something that had fallen from a shelf and is on the floor. Do you pick it up and put it back on the shelf, or leave it? Time after time, I watch as people walk on by. My kids do it at home. Walk ON the pillow instead of picking it up! ARGH!!
  3. People are coming out of a concert. You’re in a hurry. Do you wait your turn, or dodge people, cutting them off as you dart in front of them? Why not slow down and just wait?


I wish we could all be just a little more kind, because the reality is, you never know the impact your small act of kindness will have on someone else. Case in point, I got an email two days ago (at exactly 9:51 am 🙂 and it changed my whole day.


Misa,

OMG! This book [Cursed] was good. It’s a good thing that I DVR’d my shows, because I could not put this book down. That twist with the brothers, I did not see that coming. This was a great read.

I’m starting The Chain Tree tomorrow. I anticipate another giving up the TV show for this one as well.

Again, what a great story.


I think the fact that this reader took the time out of her day to tell me how she loved my book is amazing. She didn’t get anything out of it (except my everlasting devotion), but her message made me smile and feel giddy inside. It made my day (still is, in fact, two days later). I’m sure she had no idea how her message would make me feel.


Small acts of kindness. Isn’t that what we should spend our energy on, rather than the complicated twisted sisterhood relationships we focus too much time on? I imagine we’d all smile a lot more, don’t you?





Random Acts of Kindness

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With fall in the air, and the weather getting chillier, we decided to explore a warmer topic in this month’s Stiletto Soapbox: random acts of kindness. It can be as simple as someone opening the door for you at the post office when your arms are full, or a stranger giving you a smile when you need it most. Anyway, here are our favorite tales of kindness, and we’d love to hear yours, too, if you’d like to share with us.

Susan: The act of kindness that sticks out in my head isn’t exactly random, but it’s very special to me. When I was diagnosed with breast cancer and had to go through six and a half weeks of radiation therapy, my mom and mom-in-law stepped up, offering to alternate driving me five days a week for the entire span of treatment so “you will never be alone.” I wasn’t yet married to Ed, and the fact that his mom wanted to pitch in like that still astounds me. That my mother would do it was sweet enough. Even as I type this and think of “my two moms” being there for me, I tear up. If I ever need a reminder that there is goodness in the world, I just look at them and know, “yep, there is.”

Maggie: When you’re going through something difficult, it’s sometimes hard to ask for help. When I was first diagnosed with cancer, I didn’t want any help, but discovered the only way I was going to get through it was to open my heart and accept all the love and support that was offered to me. I had to put aside my feeling that accepting help was weak; I have found the opposite to be true. The first thing I received was prayer, in the form of a beautiful service that was held at my church. That buoyed me as I embarked on a chemo regimen. After that night, three nights a week for two months, meals would arrive at my door from local angels. There were countless other kindnesses that were shown me and that continue to be shown to me.

The lesson I learned was this: just as there is grace in helping others, there is grace in accepting help. How can we feel good about the times when we reach out and help if there is no one to graciously accept our support?

Rhonda (the Southern half of Evelyn David):

The other day this guy who had just fueled his truck at a service station offered to pump my gas, actually reached over and unhooked the gas pump nozzle for me before I could even get out of my car. I said no thanks, smiled, and waved him off. Truthfully, I was afraid to get that close to him with my credit card. Didn’t help that his appearance screamed “chain gang escapee.” Does it count if you’re too afraid to accept random acts of kindness???

Marian (the Northern half of Evelyn David):

I couldn’t figure out why I was having trouble coming up with examples of Random Acts of Kindness. Certainly I’ve been blessed by the kindness, generosity, sensitivity, and caring of family, friends, and even strangers. But what finally struck me is that while I am touched and thankful for these acts, great and small, I’m not surprised by them. What surprises me are Random Acts of Meanness. Fundamentally, I believe that people are basically good; that their instincts are to be helpful or at least not deliberately unhelpful. News of cruelty is so shocking because we don’t expect humans to behave that way.

Anne Frank, hidden in a cramped attic for two years to escape Nazi detection, wrote in her diary: “In spite of everything that has happened, I still believe that people are really good at heart.” I want/need to believe that too.

Marilyn: Years ago I belonged to a sorority of married women that seemed mostly to be about having parties. I learned about a family with three young kids, one developmentally disabled, and the father had lost his job. They would have no Christmas. I told the sorority gals, and we decided to provide Christmas. Each one of us purchased gifts for every member of the family, wrapped them, and provided the ingredients for a complete Christmas dinner, a Christmas tree and ornaments. We loaded everything into my old station wagon and delivered the goodies to their address. A man was working on a car in the driveway of the apartment house and asked if he could help us. When we told him where we were headed, he said, “That’s my address.” He helped us carry everything upstairs. The whole family was there and watched wide-eyed as we brought everything in. We said “Merry Christmas” and started to leave. The man said, “Wait. Where did all this come from?” I said, “You have heard of Santa Claus, haven’t you?” And we left, grinning all the way downstairs. I still feel good when I think about that day.

Misa: Once when my husband, who was a teacher at the time, was camping, he lost his wedding ring (which was my grandfather’s ring given to us before he died) in the lake. He spotted one of his students at the lake just as he was leaving, and he told the boy and his family about the ring, knowing he’d never find it. The following Monday at school, the boy came to school and proudly held up a gold wedding band. “Is this your ring?” he asked my husband. It was. The boy had spent hours diving and searching the shallow sandy bottom of the lake. And he found the ring! It was so random and so giving.

Just as the mystery community is stepping up to support Kate Collins*, these little moments remind me how loving and generous people can be, how people can band together for a common goal, and take action as an individual or as a group can impact others. I’m proud to be part of a community that supports its members in times of trouble, and I’m proud to adhere to a philosophy of random kindness and caring for others.

*Kate Collins very recently lost her husband, and we want to help her out in this difficult time. She has a newly released title from her Flower Shop mystery series just out: Dirty Rotten Tendrils. Perhaps you could buy a copy for yourself and a second copy for someone you care deeply about or even a library you love in honor of her husband. Here’s the Amazon link:
Dirty Rotten Tendrils Flower Shop