Tag Archive for: the Stiletto Gang

How Sexy Shoes Will Write This Book

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Rachel Brady

I’ve just started my third novel. Historically, these things take a while for me to finish. Four years for the first, two for the second. It’d be really nice to do this one in a year like normal writers.

My friend Laura is at the beginning of a project too. Check out her blog, One More Thing to Feel Guilty About. The woman is hilarious, and unfortunately that becomes frightfully important when you see where this story is going. Anyway, we agreed to keep each other honest this year as we muddle through our first drafts. Over dinner, I told her I was contemplating the idea of paying her a fee if I didn’t hit my word count goal each week. She favored the idea, but having already run it by my husband, I knew that he did not.

“Then I’m going to have to do something to humiliate myself if I miss the count,” I said.

She said, with a touch too much enthusiasm, that she’d like to participate in choosing what that humiliating thing would be. I’m afraid of her. Which is exactly why I said that would be fine.

At one point during the meal, I had a better idea:

“Maybe if I miss my word count, I won’t eat for a day.”

“Like, a whole day?”

“Yes, I’ll starve myself. I’m sure if I starved for a day I would never miss my word count again.”

“I could do that too. We’d be looking pretty hot.”

“The less we wrote, the better we’d look.”

We decided that the use of fasting to incentivize writing could potentially be a conflict of interest.

Somewhere between my second and third enchilada, Laura asked me about the Stiletto Gang and wanted to know if I actually, in fact, owned a pair of stilettos. I couldn’t just say yes or no, because the answer turns out to be quite involved. (Hang with me, it becomes important.)

Last April I attended the Malice Domestic Mystery Conference for the first time. On the evening of the Agatha Awards banquet, I changed clothes and joined everyone in the lounge area, where I found them all to be wearing full-up evening attire. I was in a casual dress. No big deal, I still had fun, but I did take note. Embarrassment leaves an impression, no?

Flash forward to my first Bouchercon World Mystery Convention last October. Now initiated, I shopped for some nice evening attire as soon as I sent in my registration check. This time, I’d fit right in. Got a cute LBD (little black dress) and some smokin’ black stilettos. Packed them up for Bouchercon . . . where the banquet required a ticket that cost something like a mortgage. I did not attend, nor did my LBD or sexy shoes.

“So you see,” I concluded, “I do own a pair, but I’ve actually never worn them.”

None of that matters for now, but just store it in your short term memory for a sec.

Laura and I returned to the topic of how best to humiliate myself. I said, “Maybe I’ll ask my blog followers and Facebook friends to suggest horrible things.” Most of you reading this fall into one of those camps, so I’m sure you can imagine how colorful those suggestions would likely be. “Whoever chooses the winning punishment could name a character in the book they shamed me into writing.”

This idea, we agreed, had merit.

But then after dinner, walking to our cars, Laura said, “What if you had to wear those stilettos to work?”

And we both kind of looked at each other like they do in the movies when the montage music gets cued.

“I didn’t tell you the best part,” I said. “They’re strappy sequin stilettos!”

She burst out laughing. “People will think you have no taste.”

Turns out, I actually don’t have much, but it’s easier to hide that when a girl wears business casual to work every day. Maybe it becomes more apparent when she adds sequin black stilettos to khakis and a polo.

“Of course,” she added, “I would expect photos for proof.”

“Can you imagine?” I said. “Stilettos and my NASA badge, in the same outfit?”

She feigned a pose. And so it was born. Either I’m getting a book out of this arrangement or you’re getting pictures.

Fun starts May 1st.

Puzzle Me This

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I love the movie Wordplay. Released in 2006, it’s a documentary about The American Crossword Puzzle Tournament. I watched it again last weekend with my kids and even knowing the outcome, didn’t change my enjoyment for a moment.

The director, Patrick Creadon, did what every mystery writer aims to do – create complex characters that you care about. There’s perpetual bridesmaid, Al Sanders, an engineer from Colorado who almost always finishes in the top three, but never seems to be able take home the championship belt. There’s Trip Payne, puzzle constructor and multiple-year winner, who brings more than a little swagger to his interviews. There’s Ellen Ripstein, one-time winner, baton twirler (and dropper), who tells the story of an old boyfriend who used to belittle her and she would counter that, unlike her, he’d never won a national anything. (I think it’s fair to guess that this was a love match not made in heaven.) And there’s college kid Tyler Hinman, cocky and full of himself, the equivalent of Fast Eddie, new on the scene, but not to be underestimated.

The move also has its fair share of faux crossword celebrities, like Jon Stewart, Indigo Girls, Yankee star Mike Mussina, even former President Bill Clinton. Sure they can do the New York Times puzzle in ink, even the Sunday Times!, but the real stars of Worldplay are the motley crew of geeks and cruciverbalists who meet every year at a Marriott in Stamford, CT in order to compete in the Superbowl of Crossword-dom.

What struck me when I watched the movie this time was the similarity between the crossword addict and the mystery fan. In fact, they are probably often one and the same. Besides the obvious shared affection for solving puzzles, both are essentially engaged in solitary pursuits. Both sort through false starts and red herrings, and both enjoy incredible satisfaction when they figure out the key to solving the puzzle. And like the group who meet yearly at a Marriott (this year’s convention moved from Stamford to Brooklyn), I found that same sense of enthusiasm and unbridled joy at Malice Domestic, a convention devoted to the traditional mystery.

Whatever your hobby — crossword puzzles, mysteries, gardening, rock-climbing — it’s important to find a community who shares your interests. For some, it will be at these types of conventions, but an online community, like The Stiletto Gang or DorothyL, can be every bit as rewarding as face-to-face meetings.

Thanks for sharing my love of puzzles — all kinds! Please share your hobby and whether you ever meet fellow enthusiasts, in person or online.

Evelyn David

Dating in the Modern World–Not for the Faint of Heart

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My Stiletto sisters of Monday and Tuesday have given me plenty of food for thought and I was debating between the “first date” post versus the “guilty pleasure” post. Since writing about my guilty pleasures could take a lot longer than it should, I’ll start with first dates or just dating in general.

I didn’t go on too many first dates, luckily. I was fortunate to meet my husband in college where we first became friends in one of our shared French classes. I was struggling a bit with the material and our teacher—a woman who was truly a Fairy Godmother to me and Jim—suggested that this younger man help me with my studies. Suffice it to say that the only things I can say in French are,“I need more wine, please” and “Where is the bathroom?” but I found my soul mate and the love of my life. So who cares if I confuse the words for factory and pool in French?

For some reason, though, I’ve been thinking a lot about dating mores in the modern world. I find myself having made the acquaintances of younger women and am in awe of what goes on the in the world of 21st century dating. Texting, email, Facebook, Blackberry communication…it’s daunting. Doesn’t anyone use the phone anymore? Or talk to each other face to face? Although back in the day, some of us were known to sit by the phone for hours on end waiting for that special someone to call, is the instant access of today any better? What happens if you text a paramour and don’t hear back from him/her instantly? To me, that seems much worse than staring at a non-ringing phone, willing it to trill. Knowing that everyone is plugged in twenty-four/seven and not receiving a text back would make me nuts. And I think I can safely say that that goes for the women I know out there in the dating world.

Several of my younger friends also do online dating, which I thought would be a good resource until I heard about how many potential dates post pictures of people other than themselves to draw dates in. And of course, I’m a mystery writer, so all I think about is meeting a stranger in a bar for a drink or a cup of coffee and how that scenario could go so wrong. But I also know three friends who met their spouses online; all are happy, well-adjusted, and giant proponents of online dating.

It’s the speed of everything nowadays that gives me pause. A similarly-aged friend and I were talking to a much younger friend who is attempting to embark on a new relationship. This new couple is still sorting things out—the “dance,” so to speak. My advice? Take it slow. Let it marinate. My friend’s advice? Look for a companion. Look for someone to do things with that you like to do. Have fun together. Decide what it is that is a deal breaker and what you can live with, because guess what? We’re not all perfect. Don’t expect him to hang on your every word, or vice versa. Go from sixty miles an hour to thirty and see how that feels.

The younger woman stared at us, dubious, but I did remind her that we have a combined 30 + years of marriage between us, so we can’t be all wrong, right? I know things are different, but are they truly that different?

What’s going on out there in the dating world? Your thoughts from the trenches, please.

Maggie Barbieri

Can’t We All Just Get Along?

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We are approaching that time of year when we elect two new trustees and a new mayor in our little Village. And like in years past, I find again that people who I thought I knew and liked become vicious and petty, all in support of their candidates and their personal agendas. You thought national politics was bad? You ain’t seen nothing until you’ve witnessed what goes on here.

On the one side, you’ve got a mayor who is technically a Democrat but who ran, and won, on the Republican ticket. On the other, you have a former trustee, a registered Democrat, who is vying for that position. Both men—with whom I both agree and disagree on a number of different issues—are to be commended for their willingness to throw their individual hats into this mudfest we call a “campaign.” At issue is the rezoning (according to the Democrats) or development (according to the Republicans) of a part of the Village that is virtually a ghost town, most restaurants and/or businesses having fled in the past several years for greener pastures or bankruptcy—we’re actually not sure which.

Both sides have good points. On the Democratic side, are we willing to just let this part of town founder and wither? On the Republican side, where will everyone park provided that the plan goes through to attract new businesses and increase the number of rental units? I would love to see both sides debate these issues with the facts at hand and decorum in full force. But we won’t get this wish because of the inflammatory nature of each argument. So what we get are accusations, recriminations, slander and libel.

I might be wrong, but aren’t we all adults? And don’t we live in a Village of 7,500 people where it is entirely possible that the person you wrote horrible things about on the local blog might just run into you at the Post Office?

This lack of civility in local politics—and I swear it is entirely more civilized at the national level—has me feeling very sad for our Village. It also makes me feel that someone who may be interested in becoming a public servant—and a good one at that—may see what goes in our local papers, online, and at various Village meetings and decide that they just don’t have the stomach for it. I can’t say that I blame them. A recent posting by a Villager on the local blog excoriated another poster for their opinion on a political issue related to this year’s election, ending his screed with an allegation of the other poster’s “drunkenness.” We can all disagree, and we do. But do we have to bring personal attacks into the discussion?

I guess I’d like to know from our Stiletto Gang readers if this type of behavior is rampant and exists all over the country or if what I am witnessing is an anomaly. I’m hoping it’s the latter. But at this point, all I can say is that I can’t wait for this election to be over. May the thicker-skinned candidate win.

Maggie Barbieri

In the Kingdom of Procrastinators

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It seems like procrastination is the theme of the week. Let me share some of my time-wasting secrets and tricks to avoid writing.

1. Cleaning: This is a good one because it makes you feel virtuous while you are clearly procrastinating. The minute writer’s block hits, I decide that it’s time to strip all of the beds, put all of the fancy attachments on the vacuum, and get out the Swiffer. Everyone in my family usually knows when Mom has writer’s block or is just plain old wasting time: the house is immaculate.

2. Check out the blogs: I start my morning by reading my favorite blogs, starting with the Stiletto Gang, except for Wednesday, obviously. This usually takes a solid twenty minutes. After all, where would I find out about the television shows that I missed the night before? Or what 684 commenters said about said shows? After I’m done checking out the blogs, I go to the New York Times web site to find out where the international markets closed. (I have no money, know nothing about money, yet find the ups and downs of both the domestic and international stock market fascinating. Go figure.)

3. Hang around on Facebook: This can waste, collectively, a good four to five hours a day, depending upon how serious I am about procrastinating. If I’m really in the mood, I even respond to those requests to post “25 Things Nobody Knows About You.” I’m an open book; if my friends don’t already know everything about me, I’d be surprised. Yet, here I go, listing things like “doesn’t like onions,” “thought Barry Manilow was sexy and her future husband when she was twelve,” “sings in the car.” Stuff like that. I figure I owe it to the other procrastinators out there to post interesting tidbits like this. How would they procrastinate otherwise?

4. Call Annie, Ceil, Carrie, Tina, and/or my mother and any other combination of friends and relatives: Most of them have caller ID. A lot of the time, they don’t answer the phone. Clearly, they are not procrastinators.

5. Look at shoes online: Doesn’t matter where…Zappos is a favorite, however. They have probably a million different pairs of shoes on their site, plus free shipping and returns. I can spend hours looking at different types of mules, sling backs, or pumps. Let’s not remember that I don’t cause or occasion to wear anything but sneakers and clogs. But having a website that you can peruse for hours that only has shoes is a godsend. Especially to a champion procrastinator.

6. Surf the web: Where else would I have learned that the remains of Gene Roddenberry (creator of “Star Trek”) and his wife were going to be shipped into outer space? Or that New Mexico has toughened its collection on used car sales? Or that David Beckham’s soccer team is negotiating to keep him? Next time you’re at a cocktail party and drop one of these juicy nuggets of information into the conversation, you can thank me and my endless procrastinating.

These are just a few of my techniques. Thanks to the tough love of my friend and fellow Stiletto gal, Susan McBride, I no longer a) check my book’s “number” on Amazon; b) Google myself; c) read reviews of my books online. But I’ve found other ways to waste time that are just as fulfilling.

What do you do to avoid the task of writing or anything else, for that matter? Procrastinating minds want to know…

Maggie Barbieri